Wednesday, August 31, 2011

Fear Vs. Boldness

".It's okay to be scared. Just don't forget to be bold, too."
I got this quote from someone I had the great privilege of meeting a couple months ago. His name is Ben Davis. I think I have mentioned him a time or two. He started running two years ago at the weight of about 350 lbs, and is now down to about 185, running Ironmans, triathlons, and marathons.
http://www.bendoeslife.com/
He is the core behind "Do Life". His message is to help people change their lives through exercise and fitness, and to make a positive change in their lives in general...no matter what they need to change.
When I saw this quote tonight it struck a cord with me, because there are many things I'm afraid of. I'm afraid of change, I'm afraid of losing friendships, I'm afraid of the treadmill, I'm afraid of never finding love, I'm afraid of trying new things, I'm afraid of failure...
I've been scared throughout my whole journey, but many people have helped me overcome some of my fears, by helping me become a bolder person. I'm slowly progressing over my fear of the treadmill, I've overcome my fear of not being able to run, I'm getting better at trying new things.
While I will always be afraid of failure, I am realizing more that my journey wouldn't have been successful without some form of boldness. The boldness is pushing myself to lose 55 lbs in a year and a half.  The boldness is pushing myself to run a half marathon in six months. The boldness is making new lasting friendships while knowing that the lifelong, lasting friendships I've been able to maintain throughout my lifetime will always be there as well. The boldness is having the courage to try something different, to keep challenging myself to do something better. The boldness is having lost 105 lbs in 6 years.
Today I thought I had failed because my 2 mile run turned into a 1 mile walk. I then heard words of encouragement, thought of my older brother who lost 45 lbs by walking, remembered how these last two weeks have been filled with non-stop activity, and decided to take things slow and relax a bit. The fear was the failure...the boldness was everything else.
"It's okay to be scared. Just don't forget to be bold, too."
Zumbarunner...Whether shaking it or running it, I'll cross the finish line!
 
 

Tuesday, August 30, 2011

Back At It

I know I said I'd try to write while on vacation, but that never happened. Now that I'm back, it's time to get back at it, so let's begin with vacation.

Vacation in Colorado was full of activities, SORT OF relaxing, but it was still good to get away. This was a family vacation for me, including a wedding rehearsal the Thursday evening we (my folks and I) arrived, a day trip to Estes Park on Friday, Saturday's full schedule of a mani-pedi, my nephew's wedding and reception, Sunday's Kilometers for C.O.P.S. 5k (my first altitude 5k, btw) and trip to Ft. Collins to see fellow Zumba friend, and long trip home on Monday. WHEW! It makes me tired just thinking about it!

My sister and her family even made the long trip from KCK on Friday, but not without some hitches...including a blown tire, my sister's dental fiasco, my bro in law's illness, and sheer exhaustion at the end of the day.

On Friday my folks and I drove to Estes Park through Boulder, where bikers were training for a weekend triathlon. That was cool enough to see, but what was even cooler was seeing the Boulder Running Company store. Don't even ask me why I got excited about seeing the storefront, but I did...hmm.

The wedding was nice and simple, yet elegant, with the reception at a mansion on Lookout Mountain...awesome food, too! My brother (nephew's dad) made the wedding cake....a cheesecake. John's famous for them. They also had mini cupcakes for everyone to eat, of course after eating a three course dinner consisting of a zucchini salad, beef medallions or sea bass, and asparagus. I, of course, passed on the asparagus and sea bass. That's just how I roll.

Sunday's run was in Golden 20 minutes away. It took me nearly an hour to get to the location, because I kept getting lost, and I had to get there early because I hadn't registered for it yet. I think I made it with about 5 minutes to spare! It was on a police pursuit training course on a mesa overlooking Golden. It was HOT at 9am...about 85 degrees I would say. The course was mostly flat with a couple small inclines, but not too bad. This was my first ever altitude run, which was the main reason for me to do it. It was my challenge to myself.

The race went well. It was my first chip-timed race, there were about 65 entries (including walkers), and I just took it easy, because I wasn't sure if I would get altitude sickness. I didn't struggle too hard, but just kept at a steady pace. I wasn't looking to make a personal record on this, I was just looking to finish.

I struck up a conversation with another walker during the last mile of the run. Remember, I run slow. She was impressed at how I was doing this run after only 2 days of being acclamated to the altitude adjustment, at how I was running steady throughout the whole race.

I did Kick It at the end of the race, crossing in 51:52, which was only 3 minutes behind my last 5k in August. A part of me wishes now that I would have kicked it a little bit earlier, but again, I wasn't there to set a personal record. I was there to challenge myself; to see if I could actually run a 5k in altitude.

On the way back to my motel, I was able to see some cyclists compete in the US Bicycle tour going through the area. They were racing down Lookout Mountain. That was cool!

Sunday afternoon was awesome too, after seeing a fellow Zumba member, even if only for a half hour or so.

So many memories made on this trip. It was a good trip. Time spent with family, people starting new chapters, and challenges met. Now it's back to reality, and time to once again get back at it.

Today's training...one mile street run.

Zumbarunner...Whether Shaking it or Running it, I'll cross the finish line!

 mesa view






Kilometers for C.O.P.S. runners
Kilometers for C.O.P.S. Pre-ceremony (beginning)









                                                                      Kilometers for C.O.P.S. Registration
Kilometers for C.O.P.S. finish

Thursday, August 25, 2011

Vacation Blog

Sorry folks...gonna be unavailable for a few days, although there is a lot I could write already, but I'm on a Rocky Mountain High, Colorado.

Peace y'all!

Zumbarunner...Whether shaking it or running it, I'll cross the finish line!

Did pretty good today food wise, however, that supremely divine piece of chocolate cake I just finished was to die for! Oh, don't judge...it was for a wedding rehearsal! I even ate my veggies, protiens and carbs, so there! I know, no excuse, but I did end up drinking about 4 liters of water today too...glug, glug!

Ok, maybe I will do a vacay blog...we'll see.

Tuesday, August 23, 2011

Accountability

Accountability.

You would think it wouldn't be too hard to keep status quo on something you've been doing for the past two years, but it is. Once you fall off the wagon, it's hard to get back on.

I've been falling off all summer. It's my own fault, I admit it. I've been eating again. It's been easy to hit the drive thru's in junk food alley, hit the ice cream, put that crap in my mouth, lose focus on the ultimate goal of weightloss and fitness, cut back on my discipline at the gym, and ultimately undo everything I've done to get where I am today.

There's hundreds of excuses, but no real reasons why I'm sabotaging myself. A huge part of me feels guilty because I've had people tell me I inspire them to lose weight, but a small part of me says "it's ok...you're allowed to eat what you want again, because you've earned it. You're maintaining now, you'll be ok". That's not true, and I'll admit it.

I'm struggling. I'm an emotional eater. I'm sabotaging myself. I'm making mistakes. I haven't been holding myself accountable. So what now?

I'm still exercising daily, I've gotten back to drinking 2 liters of water (most days), and I'm challenging myself to get back on track during the worst possible time...vacation. Yup! Vacation (with the family, even) starts on Thursday, complete with a long road trip, tons of wedding festivities, and seeing old friends. Am I a glutton for punishment? Admittedly so! Am I setting myself up for disaster? Definitely!

Herein lies the challenge. I come from a family of eaters. We celebrate with food. We stop frequently for "cool ones" (ice cream or pop). We eat every three or four hours. I also eat when I drive so I can stay awake. Up until this summer have I been able to resist most of this, but since I've bowed to my weaknesses this summer, it'll take all I have in me to get back on the right path again.

This whole time during my journey I've been afraid of undoing all I've done. I'm now staring at it square in the face, and not liking what I'm seeing. It's clearly an inner battle with Fat Connie, and the gloves are off again. THANKFULLY, I've been maintaining my weight this whole summer...WHEW!

The time may come soon where I'll ask for help to keep me accountable, but for right now, I'm the only one that can do it. It's up to me!

This will clearly be a big challenge for me, so supporters, keep supporting me, and those I've inspired, don't give up on me (or yourselves) just yet. I'll get to my second goal (and final) goal of 150, it just might take a little extra time.

Today's exercise...1/2 hour Zumba.

Zumbarunner...Whether shaking it or running it, I'll cross the finish line!

Sunday, August 21, 2011

Setbacks

Setbacks! UGH! I HATE setbacks! This week I have two...an injury and my love-hate relationship with food. I'm hoping the injury will clear up by the end of the week. I'm needing to tackle the food relationship NOW!

I'll keep you posted.

Zumbarunner...Whether shaking it or running it, I'll cross the finish line!

Saturday, August 20, 2011

Time To Rest

So, even though I don't think I've been pushing myself as much as I had before my half marathon in June, I've still been fairly active.
This week is a seven day work stretch for me, and as much as I hate to say this, I need a couple relax days. (sigh)

Zumbarunner...Whether shaking it or running it, I'll cross the finish line!

Friday, August 19, 2011

Staying In Touch

Today (well, techincally yesterday since it's after midnight,) I spoke to a close friend from college. We haven't spoken for close to a year. There's no real reason, except for our busy lives getting in the way.

It was great to talk to her after all this time, knowing that we can pick up where we left off, catching up on all the new things going on in each other's lives.

It makes me appreciate ALL my friends I have in my life...new ones, old ones, and everyone in between.

I can't say it enough...I have the best peeps in the world...PERIOD!

Today's workout...ok, yesterday's...lol...1 hour Zumba, 1 mile track run, abcrunch machine.

Zumbarunner...Whether shaking it or running it, I'll cross the finish line!

p.s. It's my folk's 48th anniversary today! Happy Anniversary Mom and Dad!

Wednesday, August 17, 2011

Persistence

Is it stubbornness, or is it persistence that pays off in the end? I think they're the exact same thing, just one word has a whole different connotation than the other. Translation, stubbornness implies bullheadedness...persistence implies determination.

Last week, my sunglasses broke. No big thing, right, but these sunglasses are magnetic clip-ons, and cost $70 to replace. It's my own damn fault they broke, I'll admit it, but it meant driving and working without sunglasses, something I'm not keen on doing...especially being light sensitive.

After the "nerd tape" on my frames didn't work, I went to at least 6 or 7 eye places, and one jewelry store, to see if they could fix my shades..."nope, we don't do that. They're broken in the wrong place anyway...you'll have to order new ones."

My yass I will...

After one more shot today at yet another eyecare place here in Kearney, "sure, we'll give it a try...just leave them here and we'll call you". UGH! What's another day without sunglasses? I've waited for a week already. Four hours later they called, said they got my glasses fixed. HALLELUIAH! For a mere $25, my glasses were fixed! Run and tell that to those who just wanted me to spend another $70 to get new ones...

That's persistence.

I guess persistence and stubbornness is how I have to look at my journey. This time they're the same thing. The persisitence is trying to keep my journey going, vowing not to stop. The stubbornness is defying the haters and doubters; trying to defy MY inner hater, (Fat Connie), proving to everyone and myself that I have achieved my results so far, and have farther to go before I'm done. 

The stubbornness is also working against me; allowing me to stray off my path, becoming less focused, less disciplined than usual. It's a daily struggle to find a balance between persistence and stubbornness, but I still manage to put my shoes on, still do something, maybe not as much but still something, with the full knowledge of knowing that I MUST do more...because I'll be damned if I'm going to revert completely. I've worked too hard. I've accomplished a lot, but I need to achieve more, and I will...in time.

That's persistence...That's stubbornness...That's me.

http://youtu.be/XwI4zsNteU8

Today's workout...1 hour Zumba class.

Zumbarunner...Whether shaking it or running it, I'll cross the finish line!

Tuesday, August 16, 2011

Believe It Sista!

After 40-some odd years of always dwelling on the negatives, I'm finding myself remembering the positive things a little more than I used to. It's very strange, but maybe that's part of the journey to be my better self. Here's two of the things that happened last weekend.

After completing a 5k that we both participated in, a close friend of mine gave me what was rightfully hers...her first place medal. Priceless!

The next day, while working, I saw a co-worker I haven't seen in a few couple months. She works in a different department and city than I do.

Marcia sees me and says "You've lost weight!"
"Yes I have!"
"Did you mean to?"
"Yes I did. Zumba and running. I lost 55 lbs in a year and a half, and 105 in 6 years."
"Well I had to do a double-take, when they said Connie!"

I can live with that!

Today's workout...none...will start back tomorrow...pinky swear.

Zumbarunner...Whether shaking it or running it, I'll cross the finish line!

Monday, August 15, 2011

Finally...

My weekend's here! WOOOOOOOOOOOOO! It's been a REALLY eventful week, filled with a huge rollercoaster of emotions, and tons of drive time, and now it's time to chill, pickle!

Back at the training harder than ever tomorrow...but now, it's time for pizza and ice cream!

Zumbarunner...Whether shaking it or running it, I'll cross the finish line!

Saturday, August 13, 2011

Selflessness

I learned the true act of selflessness today. I (along with a bunch of other people) ran a memorial 5k this morning. Many of my friends ran too. They're all WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY faster than me too, but in true runner's style, we all ran our own races.

Some of us pr'd (lingo for personal best), all of us ran because we love to run, some finished (close) to last (me), some of us won our individual categories...but ALL of us won.

I learned the true act of selflessness today, which confirms what I have known all my life...that my friends, my anchors, my supporters are truly amazing people, and I"m TRULY blessed to have them all in my corner.

Today's workout: Lizzie Stratton 5k Memorial Run...49.10 (pr)

Zumbarunner...Whether shaking it or running it, I'll cross the finish line!






Friday, August 12, 2011

Coincidence? I Think Not!

I first started running races in April, with a 2 mile run during Grand Island's Race For Grace. I was busy tieing my shoes when the race started, so I ran with one loose shoe and one tight shoe. I also didn't have my music ready either.

During my 10k in May, it was really cold, and my first stupid, cheap pedo watch stopped working 1/3 of the way into the run.

June's Buffalo Co. Stamped Half Marathon, I was using the "facilities" at the beginning of the race, forcing me to start late.

Today's the day before Lizzie's 5k in Kearney, and my sunglasses break. This is a $68 pair of magnetic clip-ons, yo...

Coincidence? I think not!

Zumbarunner...Whether shaking it or running it, I'll cross the finish line!

Thursday, August 11, 2011

Celebrity Sighting

I've always been into sports, but have never had the opportunity to play...ok, the exception being in softball during summers growing up, but other than that, not a chance. Fast forward to today.

Ever hear of Rulon Gardner? No? Maybe this will ring a bell...two time Olympic wrestler...no? Nebraska native...nothing? How about this...Season 11 Biggest Loser contestant...ok, now, you're back.

He came to Kearney today during a Live Well Nebraska tour. Chance to meet someone famous? You betcha! Chance to Zumba with someone famous? Ok, that didn't happpen...it should have, but it didn't. Oh well.

I got to meet Rulon Gardner...ok, so did a bunch of other people, but I got to meet him, talk with him for a minute, and get my picture taken with him. Ok, so did a bunch of other people, but hey, work with me here.

He walked off the Biggest Loser because he felt he was ready to train for the 2012 Olympic wrestling team. He wants another shot. It was kind of inspiring to see him, and hear that he's had to overcome a bunch of obstacles in order to get where he is.

Today I told Rulon the short story...the "I lost 55 lbs in a year and a half" story, instead of the whole "I lost 100 lbs in 6 years, but the last 55 were in a year and a half."...I don't know how to refer the subject just yet. To me, it's easier to say the 55lbs in a year and a half than to say the whole schpeel.

Regardless, I got a little more motivation today, got to hug some really HOT guys (for the picture, of course), and tackled another fear at my third Zumba class. All is good with the world.

Today's workout...2 hours of Zumba, and 2 mile run on "dreadmill".

Zumbarunner...Whether shaking it or running it, I'll cross the finish line!


Tuesday, August 9, 2011

Umm, Excuse Me?

I have a love/hate relationship with shopping, well, mostly a hate/hate relationship, but slowly getting better. One good thing, I don't have to wear big mama clothes any more. That's a definite bonus.

The weird thing is that I'm actually starting to like clothes that I would never in a million years think of liking, or even look good in, but I'm just starting to get comfortable with it. Enter, the dressing room associate.

I'm trying on this really cute blouse today. I picked up two different sizes just to make sure which one I would get. So I tried on the medium...yes, I said MEDIUM! Run and tell that! Pshhhh...OK!

Anyway, I walk out to the mirror, and dressing room associate is out back there clearing of the "don't like" rack, so I asked her what she thought...."have you ever thought about shapewear?"

SIGH...wow, thanks nice sales associate, and you could do with a makeover yourself...(no, I didn't say that).

"don't like" rack 1, self confidence -50.

Today's workout...Ran 2.2 miles in 34:55 min...including four (or six) ok, four, blocks of (intermittent) sprints, a couple blocks of walking, and the rest running/slogging.

Sprints are evil, and they must be destroyed.

Zumbarunner...Whether shaking it or running it, I'll cross the finish line!

Monday, August 8, 2011

Slow Progression

This summer has been a tough one for everyone, but personally, my workouts are taking the brunt of the hit. Let's face it, it's been NASTY HOT outside, not to mention super long workdays, and battling Fat Connie...they've all taken their toll.

Although I'm still faithfully doing my Zumba workouts, my runs have been less than stellar. Oh sure, I've done a bunch of 5k's, but my daily runs are only consisting of one, maybe two miles at most. What gives? It was only 3 months ago that I was pushing myself every week to do another mile so I could run a half marathon. Have I lost the motivation? I don't think so, but life has gotten in the way. That is a reason...or maybe an excuse. It's too hard to tell.

I'm proud of the fact that I'm still running (most) every day, that my time has gotten (a skosh) better, and that I'm still entering races, even if I do run my own race and end up last every single time.

I won't lie, it's a constant struggle to stay focused, and the progression to stay fit is now on a slow track, but it's still on track. I still put my shoes on, and I don't intend on stopping any time soon.

Slow progression? Maybe, but I'm progressing regardless.

Today's workout...1:16 mile street run in 18.35 min...15.8 min/mile, 2,877 steps and 103 calories burned.

Zumbarunner...Whether shaking it or running it, I'll cross the finish line!

Friday, August 5, 2011

Patience Part 2

I recently signed up to run in the Susan G. Komen Race for the Cure here in Kearney. It's the first one here, and it's evidently the first double run, teaming with a run the next day in Omaha. I think I signed up for it about a month or so ago. I found that to be a mistake.

I have an unusual work schedule, working through the weekends and having Tuesdays and Wednesdays off, and if I have a 5k scheduled on a Saturday, I can usually run that and then work the rest of the day. I thought I could do the same thing on October 1st. This time, my plan won't work too well.

After a brief email (and the longest weeklong wait for a reply) to the organizers of the event, they were gracious enough to switch my registration to the Sunday run in Omaha. I guess patience does really work...for some things.

Today's workout summary...1 hour Zumba, 35 minute "dreadmill" run...2nd half of that @ 3.7miles per hour and .05 % incline. Hey...I'm just starting on the dreadmill...don't judge.

Zumbarunner...Whether shaking it or running it, I'll cross the finish line.

p.s...you can visit my facebook page if you're interested in pledging a donation for my run in October.

Wednesday, August 3, 2011

Trying My Best

"PATIENCE, GRASSHOPPER"...

I'm not a patient person. Ask anyone who knows me...it's one of my biggest flaws in 99% of everything I do. I am working on it though.

"PATIENCE"...(sigh)

Today's workout...Run 2.33 miles in 37.31...16 min mile; 1 hour Zumba immediately following.

Zumbarunner...Whether shaking it or running it, I'll cross the finish line.

Tuesday, August 2, 2011

I'll Start Tomorrow

I'll start tomorrow. I've been saying that all summer, haven't I? Well, here's one more day of it.

I also got a new blouse last week for my birthday. It's a medium, and it fits, and it doesn't have any excess material on the sides like the large one did. I chose the medium fit because the sales associate said, "what if you don't lose that extra 25 pounds that you're wanting to lose?"

Zumbarunner...whether shaking it or running it, I'll cross the finish line.

Monday, August 1, 2011

Old Cadillacs and Cool Cats

Why do I always get stuck behind old cadillacs when I'm haulin ass to work? You know the driver doesn't really have a timeline to get anywhere. I got stuck behind TWO of them...TWO! Now I know how I must look when I'm running...I'm the driver of the old cadillac, though I do have a timeline to get where I'm going.

Coming through downtown Kearney tonight, I saw a cat cross the street on a green light. I swear, it waited until the crosswalk machine(ok, forgot what it's called), changed from "wait" to "walk" to cross, AND it used the pedestrian crosswalk to cross! HOW COOL IS THAT? And noone thinks animals are smart.

Today I ran 1:19 miles in 90 degree heat at 11am...I learned my lesson quick!

Zumbarunner...Whether shaking it or running it, I'll cross the finish line!