Tuesday, May 29, 2012

The Buck Stops Here

This installment has been a long time coming; three weeks in fact. In that amount of time I ran my first of three half marathons for the year (Lincoln), put in tons of hours at work immediately following that weekend, and, to put it bluntly, I lost my motivation and focus.

The excuses? There's plenty. The reasons? Are there really any reasons? Not really. It's becoming increasingly difficult for me to figure out the difference between reason and excuse. I can blame sheer exhaustion for a lot of my lack of motivation and focus, but in the end, it comes down to me.

This lack of motivation and focus has led to poor judgement, as it usually does with everybody. I was (and still am) on the quest for the perfect bavarian filled chocolate bismarck. I've been eating TONS of junk food and fast food, and spent way too much money while doing it; $35 in the past 2 weeks alone, and gained a few pounds in the process. I knew that was wrong, but I continued to do it, and in the process, Fat Connie crept from the back of my mind to the front of my mind.

So? Here's what's "So". The Buck Stops Here. I can CHANGE this and turn it into a POSITIVE.

I'm human. I should be allowed to make mistakes and fall off the wagon, but if I continue to do that, I'll let Fat Connie win the war. That's NOT about to happen. This lack of motivation and focus has also spurred me to get BACK on the wagon. During this past week I have started running and tracking my food intake again, and am focusing on my next half marathon (Buffalo County Stampede) on June 10th.

Today I watched the French Open first round match between #111 world ranked Virginnie Serrano and #5 world ranked Serena Williams. As you can imagine, Serena was easily favored to win, with 5 unbeaten records leading into the match, including the most consecutive first round wins (46). Both women struggled during the whole match, and Serena should have even won in the second set, being ahead 5-1. You could even see the emotion in Serena's face during her struggle to maintain the edge and was hard to watch. During the THREE HOUR match, Virginnie cramped, even lost points due to shouting during 3rd set but she was scrappy and pulled off the upset over Serena.

Relevance to "The Buck Stops Here?" There's tons of it. I'm a huge fan of the Williams sisters, but no matter what the fight, either big like defeating someone like Serena Williams or small like overcoming the urge to splurge on crappy food, if you can overcome the battle you can win the fight to continue to do your best to improve.  To me that's a fighter, that's what being an underdog is all about; that's a true champion.

Zumbarunner...Whether shaking it or running it, I'll cross the finish line!

Sunday, May 6, 2012

Lincoln Half Marathon...D-U-N...DONE!

Lincoln Half Marathon...What can I say about it that it was SUCH a blast! The atmosphere was simply AMAZING! I got a high five from ELVIS, there were students playing the Japanese Katanya drums, some random guy playing his drum set in the back of his pickup, gave tons of kids high fives, a praise band along the way...

Our bibs also were personalized  with our names on the front, so I would occassionly hear "hey Connie, great job!". I also got a couple folks asking me if I was reppin Team Lizzie and thought it was cool I was, and I kept talking to spectators and volunteers along the route.

I even got to talk to Ben Davis this weekend, he actually saw me and recognized first! WOOT!

What an absolutely spectaculate experience!

Now, I need to crash...

Zumbarunner...whether shaking it or walking it, I'll cross the finish line!

Friday, May 4, 2012

Nervous? Who Me? Pshhh...Whatevs...OK, Maybe A Little

Yes, I know I should be sleeping. That's not the point, well, maybe it is.

In less than 36 hours I'll be hitting the streets of Lincoln for my first half marathon of the year, also my first Lincoln Half Marathon of my running career. I have heard many FABULOUS things about this run, so I figured this year, what the hell...

This is also the first race I've ever TRAINED for. When I did Buffalo County Stampede last year, it was only because a friend asked me if I was going to do it because she was planning on it. I took that as a challenge, and said OK. I think that was in about May, and the longest I had run was a 10k (6.2 miles). Last year was my first year actually RUNNING (EVER, like in my LIFE), and so I just pushed myself to run an extra mile each week leading up to the race in June. Let's just say that last year's half mile was BRUTAL, but I finished. It did take a toll on me, however...mentally, physically and emotionally, probably because I hadn't trained like I should have.

Lincoln is first out of three half marathons for me, next one is Buffalo County Stampede in June, and the third is Chicago half marathon in September. Unfortunately, and I'll admit it, I have been focusing MORE on Chicago than I have on Lincoln.

Fast forward to this year, and did everything I was supposed to do. I followed a plan, I added workouts, I sacrificed workouts (sorry Zumba...I WILL RETURN!), I (sort of) watched what I ate, until boom, a calf injury forces me to end my training two weeks early. This may be a blessing in disguise though, because it's forcing me to actually THINK about the race.

So here's where things get interesting. It's been said if you can run 10, you can run 13.1.  My longest run has been 8 miles THREE WEEKS PRIOR to race day (13.1). I have a (minor) calf injury, requiring me to get a calf wrap to support my right calf muscle while running. I've worn this twice, both times running very MINIMAL miles. Is my injury just a mental test to see if I have what it takes to run this whole race? Am I too afraid of what MIGHT happen that is making the annoyance of the injury stay there and lurk about when I run on Sunday? There's 10 THOUSAND people running on Sunday. Will I still be the last one in out of 10,000, or will I represent my bib number (9779) and be 221 away from being the last one to cross? Have I focused too much on Chicago that I've completely just let Lincoln fly under the radar? Finally, will I be able to cross in under 4 hours and 4 minutes (last year's hm time)?

These are all issues that, if I ALLOW myself, are making me a bit nervous about Sunday. The thing is, I'm hoping that all my training has made me strong enough to bypass most of these issues.

While training, I made a conscious effort to (try to) free my mind of any obstacle. Most of the time I was successful. There's a line in one of my favorite movies, The Last Samurai, where Tom Cruise's character is stuck in a remote village as a prisoner, and against his captors' wishes, starts training as a Samurai fighter. While being repeatedly defeated, one villager comes up to him and reminds him that he has too much on his mind. He's minding this, minding that, minding people watching. "NO MIND". He clears his thoughts and comes to a draw with the warrior he's been challenging.

"NO MIND".

That's how I hope to beat the nerves on Sunday.

Zumbarunner...Whether shaking it or running it, I'll cross the finish line!

Wednesday, April 25, 2012

In The Land Of Uh-Oh

This week, we head to the Land of Uh-Oh, as I start week two of nursing a sore calf muscle. Yes, it's back. The tweeked rat bastard charley horse of a calf muscle made itself known again during my somewhat futile attempt to run a 5 miler today at the Y.

What started off as a simple (yet mildly painful) annoyance during last Tuesday's 5 miler turned into my taking last week off from training so it could heal. My end of the week attempt at Zumba didn't even make it feel bad, so I thought I was set.

NOT SO FAST THERE SISTA!

Today I went back to the Y to do my first 5 miler in a week. It started out fine, but within the first mile, I started noticing the muscle. Ok, nothing hurting, no problem. Within mile 2, muscle started making itself noticeable just a little more, but not hurting. I stretched a bit, walked a bit, and the noticeable muscle starting working its way across to the mid calf area. DAMN!

OK, tonight, there's a bit of pain. So here we are in the Land of Uh-Oh, because it's the week of my final long run (10 miles) on Friday before next week's 13.1 at the Lincoln Half Marathon. 

 Am I being paranoid? Am I letting the FEAR of my injury cause me NOT to finish my training leading up to Lincoln? They say if you can run 10 you can run 13.1. I already know I can run 12, because that's how much of Buffalo County Stampede I ran LAST year. This year the farthest I've run at one setting is 8 miles. CRAP!

So for now, I'm wallowing in the Land of Uh-Oh, back on the couch, and back to the food. That's a whole nother story.

The land of uh oh is NOT a place I want to be so close to the race. Last year I pushed myself from barely able to run 1 mile in January, to running 12 out of 13 miles during the Buffalo County Stampede in June. This year, I'm actually training and am sidelined the last two weeks? WAY UNCOOL, MAN!

I'm hoping this Land of Uh-Oh turns out to be just a layover, as it were. Regardless, though, I'm bound and determined to use this as a catalyst for Lincoln next Sunday.

ZUMBARUNNER SHALL PREVAIL!

In the meantime...UH-0H!

Zumbarunner...Whether shaking it or running it, I'll cross the finish line!

Wednesday, April 18, 2012

WOW!

Wow...what a week so far, huh? Another weightloss goal met, being featured in a blog on a newly launched website? I really don't know what to say!

I started this journey and STILL am doing this journey for MYSELF; that will never change. Before my journey began, I didn't give a DAMN about myself or my health. I have NEVER imagined myself EVER being an inspiration to anyone in any thing I have ever done in my life, but being an inspiration to others is very overwhelming, rewarding and humbling. 

What inspires me? YOU do. Everyone who has ever supported me throughout my journey; everyone who's ever told me to keep up the good work;  everyone who has ever had to (and still HAS to) remind me about the accomplishments I have achieved; everyone in my Zumba classes, bodypump, spinning, bootcamps, YMCA programs, fellow runners, fellow walkers, friends, family, race directors, race volunteers...and haters. YOU all inspire me to keep on keeping on.

 I might could be able to do this by myself, but it would be an awfully lonely road to travel. So from the top of my head to the bottom of my incredibly broken down running sneeks, I thank each and every one of you. You keep inspiring me, and I'll keep inspiring you...deal?

Thank you all!

Zumbarunner...Whether shaking it or running it, I'll cross the finish line!

Sunday, April 15, 2012

From Heavyweight To Middleweight

On Thursday, June 2nd, 2011, I started my blog about my weightloss journey double milestone from the suggestion of my great friend and Zumba instructor, Sanae Shea. The double milestone was losing 100 pounds in six years, and losing 50 pounds in one year. Both happened on June 2nd, 2011.

This is how I started my blog.

 It's finally happened! I've lost 100 pounds! Sure, it took me six years to do it, but it's done! Even if today's the only day the scale hits this number, 178, it's a great day!

Today, April 15, 2012, I enter another milestone in my weightloss journey...

It's official! I've lost 110 pounds! Sure it took me SEVEN years to do it, but it's done! Even if today's the only day the scale hits this number, 168, it's a great day!

It has taken lots of dedication, hard work, sweat, and a permanent lifestyle change on my part to get to where I am. It's also taken lots of patience, encouragement, belief, and some tough love from EVERY ONE of my supporters to help me get to where I am today. I know it's been difficult, because those who really know me know that I am the LAST person to believe in MYSELF. I still can't seem to do it most of the time even though I know I should, and everyone else believes in me.

Last year after my initial weightloss, my doctor suggested I try to maintain the same weight for a year. A year! PSHHHHHHH...WHATEVER! A year is a long time. I didn't want to wait a whole year, I wanted to lose that next 28 pounds with such a quickness! I wanted to shed down to 150 so fast I couldn't stand it, and I'm STILL in that mindset.

 Well, much to my chagrin, and much to my surprise, I maintained for the next year. I do have to say though, hitting the plateau and staying there REALLY DOES SUCK! I gained six pounds over Christmas, and it took me at least 2 months to get back to where I was BEFORE Christmas...UGH! I'm addicted to that damn bathroom scale, and it's a DEFINITE LOVE/HATE relationship. I'm below that now, and it's AMAZING! That's one of the reasons why I'm rejoicing so much about losing another 10 pounds. 10 pounds...big, fat, hairy deal! UM...HEll YEAH...BIG, FAT, HAIRY DEAL!

There's a double meaning to the title of today's blog. The first one is logical...lose a hundred pounds, you're no longer considered a heavyweight...ha ha.

Here's the second meaning. Take my last name...WEIGHT. Like any other last name in the universe, there's tons (ha ha) of ways to spell last names, so nobody ever gets it right. "How do you spell that?" W-E-I-G-H-T..."wait...spell that again?"...sigh. Just like weight...you know, weight (show the weightlifting gesture)...JUST LIKE HEAVY.

JUST LIKE HEAVY...

My dad ALWAYS says this when asked to spell our last name. Just like "heavyweight". Sorry dad, I love you, but I was NEVER comfortable in describing it like that, so I'm trying to say just like "lightweight", though I sometimes do use just like "heavyweight" probably because I'm so used to hearing it and not being used to saying "middleweight" or "lightweight".

I know I still have a long ways to go before I meet my 2nd milestone of hitting 150. I know it will probably take another long time to reach it. I hope not, but if it's meant to happen, it's meant to happen.

Thanks again to all my supporters. I'm truly blessed to have you all in my corner. Thanks to all my haters as well, because y'all push me even harder to keep my healthy lifestyle in check and keep moving forward on my journey.

As for now, I'm perfectly comfortable with going from heavyweight to middleweight.

Zumbarunner...Whether shaking it or running it, I'll cross the finish line!






Saturday, April 14, 2012

Accomplishments

Today I achieved a milestone since starting my running journey. I completed the 10k course at Race For Grace in Grand Island. My performance wasn't pretty by any means, but I finished, nonetheless.

As some of you may know, I started officially running in January of 2011. It was hard, because I have never really done anything physical throughout most of my life, except starting Zumba in February 2010.

When I started running last year, I could barely run a block without having to walk MOST of the time, but I kept plugging away...SLOWLY. As I kept going, I started wondering if I could ever run any races, so, to keep me encouraged, one of my good friends told me if I found a race I wanted to do, she'd run it with me. A few days later, I found a two mile Race For Grace and took my friend up on her challenge. 

So last year's Race For Grace came. The nerves were flowing, I had to wear my walking sneeks because I didn't like my running shoes and had to return them. I was there with my friend and her friend. The scene was a whole new thing for me to drink in...ALL THOSE PEOPLE! More than 600 people signed up for last year's 2 mile and 10k. I didn't know what to expect. When the race started, my shoelaces were loose, I didn't have my music ready, it was foggy and misty,  could barely keep up with my friends, and kept apologizing to them that I wasn't keeping up or couldn't keep up the conversation.

The map showed a short loop we had to take twice to finish 2 miles. That loop is WAY longer when you run it, but I finished strong with a kick in the end to one of our Zumba songs, Proud Mary by Tina Turner. I was hooked! The feeling of the atmosphere is so great, like being on stage and getting applause. I did 13 more races throughout the 2011 season.

Last year, after the race, my girlfriend took a picture of me next to the 10k sign looking forward to next year's race.

Fast forward to next year's race, which was today. I was bound and determined to do the 10k this year. This race, after all, was where it all began for me. I am now able to run farther and go longer. Every race is different, however. You learn something new every time you put your shoes on before a race. Today I learned that NO MATTER what you struggle through to get to the end, the important thing is to FINISH! I struggled through the whole thing, yet I finished strong, with the last two songs "Champ of the World" by Nelly, and "I Know U Want" me by Pitbull...one of our Zumba classics.

I was last again today by a long margin. I didn't set a personal best time AT ALL, but in the grand scheme of things, my personal best wasn't about time. It was to pay tribute to my first race and to honor those suffering from cancer.

Today was definitely an accomplishment for me. PR or no PR...I'll take it!

Zumbarunner...whether shaking it or running it, I'll cross the finish line!